Reporting to you live from Grover’s Mill New Jersey.

Cloverfield(2008)

There is something about a movie with a giant monster in it that appeals to the ten year old in all of us. The fascination with dinosaurs never quite seems to leave us no matter how old we get. JJ Abrams, the creator of Lost,loves Godzillamovies, and wanted to make an American giant monster. I suppose he felt he couldn’t use King Kongbecause of Peter Jackson’srecent film, so he created one of his own.

The first trailer for Cloverfield barely showed the audience anything, but we knew a giant monster was in Manhattan. The later trailers were just as secretive, but we knew that the movie would be shown to us in a first person perspective, through the use of a hand held camera. The reviews for Cloverfield mostly read about the audience getting motion sickness, and a lot of people have compared it to “The Blair Witch Project”due to uses of similar camera techniques. Like all giant monster films, Cloverfield has a message under the footsteps of the giant beastie. It’s a simple message that many members of our modern society have failed to grasp. “Put away your camera phone, there are more important things to do.”

This is a Godzillamovie for the self-absorbed camera phone using MySpace generation. The first half hour of the movie is nothing but twenty something drama, and a game of MySpace rumor mill. The only way to kill this sort of behavior is with explosions, a giant monster and the flying head of the Statue of Liberty landing in the middle of the street. But sadly, this sort of behavior can’t be stopped by flying landmarks the panicked crowds simply stop running in terror to take cell phone photos of the decapitated symbol of liberty. So Abrams upped the ante, by using cinematography inspired by news footage from September 11, 2001. Nothing like a building crumbling into dust and flooding the streets with debris to make people forget their camera phones.

The monster isn’t clearly visible until the last quarter of the movie, the camera operator Hudson “Hud” (heads up display, cute joke there) focuses his attention on his three friends who escaped death with him. We the audience are subjected to Hud’s rotten sense of humor as the foursome hunkers down for safety, until Hud’s bud remembers that the girl he treated badly earlier in the picture, that he actually is in love with, is right in the path of the monster. Yes folks, they head right into the waiting tentacles of death to rescue her. We then get to see a quaint tribute to FDNY, some looters, and a street level view of the US armed forces attacking the beast as it rips down buildings.

The monster is CGI, the sets are not, and debris falls with the proper weight and crashing affects. The special affects worked nicely to show us the death rattle of the Big Apple. The storyline, what there is of it, holds true, and the characters have believable reactions to the situations they are placed in. The best part of this movie is that the monster’s origin is not explained. I watched the credits until the end, humanity never finds out why this beast is destroying everything in its path. I left the cinema feeling satisfied that I had seen a giant monster destroy New York City, and with a sense that the Red Sox, Yankees rivalry was ended for all time. Luckily for me, no one in the theatre threw up in his or her popcorn bucket.

The movie had trailers for Iron Man, Hellboy2, and the new Star Trek movie. Which were worth the price of a matinee ticket by themselves.

Batman Begins, Spoiler Free Review

The great thing about Batman is, there is nearly 70 years of continuity.The bad thing about Batman is, there is nearly 70 years of continuity. It's a double edged sword. If you write new plot, the fans hate you. If you work with old plot, you won't get as many new fans as things are to confusing.

How do you work around this? That's simple, hire David S. Goyer to write your script. The man could unravel 60 years of Hawkman plot contradictions, he can make your script work. Goyer can take existing worlds of fiction and spin a lovely yarn that fits your characters to a T.

Batman Begins combines every plot element that you could want in a Batman story. Violence, shadows, wise cracking butlers, corrupt Cops, madmen bent on destruction, insanity, emotions, and fear. All using established characters from the comic books. Well aside from Katie Holms staring as "token love interest", her character never appeared in the comics. But this is Hollywood after all, it couldn't very well be a summer blockbuster without a damsel in distress now could it?

The film doesn't deny the previous BatFilms, in fact it pays homage to them. There's nods galore to Burton's work. Even a stylized shot or two that Schumaker might have made (I hate that man, he still needs to be called on the carpet for my mental anguish over Batman & Robin). And of course, this movie ends with a "sequel potential" ending.

The combat scenes are fairly blurry, and make excessive use of "barfycam". The kind of shot where you are meant to feel as if you are a part of the action. I believe that this was done on purpose, as we the audience don't get to see Batman during fights anymore then the common street thug does.

In the past 4 years the market has been drowning in a luke warm sea of comic book adaptation movies. Batman Begins is proof that a good writer, classic story-lines, a fantastic cast, and a quality production will produce a hit. Hollywood producers pay attention, you can make a pulp 4 color dime magazine into box office bucks, and you can do it without insulting the fans intelligence.

written June 16, 2005, movie released June 15, 2005

Remember remember, the 5th of November

V for review

How does a man write a reView of a moVie based on a bookthat changed his life? Where does one start to write about the celluloid’s mimicking passages of text that made a young man actually start to think?

Well Very simply, one begins at the beginning and moVes forward onto the end of the writing piece. It helps to haVe a cleVer opening line though. And it neVer hurts to haVe a joke that carries on throughout the piece either.

I’d like to state, for the record, that Alan Moore is a crackpot. But he is perhaps one of the best comic book writers eVer. “V for Vendetta” is one of this best works, so of course Hollywood had to attempt to translate his anti fascism pro personal freedom tale into a 10-dollar ticket.

Well now dear reader, I’m sure you’re only reading this to find out weather or not I found it to be worth the price of admission. If you’re reading this expecting to see spoilers, and descriptions of where the moVie deVeated from the book, then you’re going to be disappointed.

The Internet is full of self-described critics, each of them their only credentials an ISP address, and a keyboard. This does not a critic make. A critic is one who reViews and discusses the work critically. If a critic hears one sentence in the movie, and bases their entire opinion on that one sentence, then they haVe critiqued one sentence and not the film itself.

The worst of all self-described critics, is the self-described comic book fan turned film critic. Any change to the story, any single missed line or segment of story brings down the wrath of these keyboard warriors. Safely hidden behind their ISP address they broadcast their message of displeasure and entertainment unrest, confident that they themselVes could have written a better film while sitting in their bathtub.

V had a message, he had a story to tell, and he was an idea. Once an idea has been born, it is nearly impossible to kill. It takes a lot more effort then a troll writing from his bathtub could possibly put forward. V’s message is alive and well on the big screen. As for V’s identity, it is as obscured and hidden as it eVer was on the printed page.

written April 9, 2006 after viewing on IMAX

Wandering the world of What If...?

What If…?

What if the Fantastic Four got their Super Powers in 2005 instead of in 1961? Well some aspects of the story would have to be changed; after all it’s over 40 years later. It simply wouldn’t do for the plot to begin with Reed Richards racing “the reds” to outer space. It especially wouldn’t do to have him stealing his own under funded rocket ship, with his best friend, his girlfriend, and her kid brother in tow. So we’ll need to modernize that a bit.

Instead of racing for space conquest in the cold war, Reed is trying to save his failing business. What exactly his business is isn’t stated, but it’s got a lot of scientific gadgets, so obviously Reed is a genius of some sort. We’re told that his ex-girlfriend Sue is a genius as well. Even though neither one of them ever has much in the way of scientific dialogue, or even much prowess with words. So we the audience have to trust the scriptwriter when we’re told that they are genius’s, even if there is no evidence of this genius.

Ben and Johnny are both ex-military, Ben has retired, and Johnny was thrown out for dating underwear models. That tells us that Ben is the responsible friend, and Johnny is the teen heartthrob friend. Both of them are pilots, so they argue over who will pilot the ship to the space station where they will experiment with cosmic rays, which will eventually grant them super powers. Even though we never see either of them pilot, they are pilots. Again we have to trust the scriptwriter in this small facet of the film.

We have two geniuses, which don’t seem it, and two pilots who don’t actually fly anything. I’m not seeing anything Fantastic here, are you? Obviously the fantastic element of this movie should have been the scripts ability to handle 4 strong heroic characters, give them all equal screen time and allow us to watch all four of their characters develop. Sorry folks, don’t get your hopes up, it didn’t happen that way.

Jessica Alba has potential to be a strong presence on the screen, so they had her turn invisible every time things got good. What is the point in having her best scenes in the movie without her actually being in them? Her special affects over shadowed her, such a waste of an actor’s talent.

Well I found the fantastic in this movie, buried under orange rock was a man named Michael Chiklis. Cast as “the ever lovin’ blue eyed Thing”; he single handedly saved this film. Deep brooding, angst, ugly, rejected, despondent, three fingered clobbering was the only thing that could save this film. Over the years, the fan favorite member of the Fantastic Four has always been, Ben Grim. The man trapped inside an orange rock shell, a monster tormented by his own body. The Thing comes through in the nick of time and saves his friends from a horrible enemy, the script.

60 years is a lot of pulp ink to squeeze into 90mins of film, I feel that they shouldn’t have tried to do it. A simple origin story would have been an excellent way to tell this tale; there was no need to burry the audience in dozens of plot points and characters.

Brush after every meal to prevent cavities

Once upon a time, in a faraway land lived a little boy named Charlie Bucket. Charlie was not at all different from you or I save for one simple thing, Charlie had a book written about him. A wondrous cautionary modern fairy tale about virtue, and what can happen to you if you stray from it. That wondrous book was made into a movie, and Charlie’s name was taken away from it. Forever cast under the shadow the great Willie Wonka. Charlie lost his movie, and became a minor character living in the shadow of the prince who saved him from utter squalor.

Tim Burton has found little Charlie Bucket, and has reintroduced the world to that little boy, who isn’t so terribly different from you or I at all really. Then Charlie reintroduced us to the prince who would save us all from squalor, the great chocolate maker Willie Wonka.

Wonka takes us all on a colorful journey of chocolate, mirth, wonder, and values. Did I say us? Of course I meant to say that Wonka takes Charlie Bucket on that journey, but sometimes it is hard to tell where Charlie Bucket ends, and we the audience begin.

Charlie sees all that Wonka has to offer the joy and the pointlessness of that most amazing thing in the world, candy. Wonka shows Charlie sights undreamed of, joys unknown to a boy so used to squalor, a boy old before his time learns that there is a magical kingdom waiting for him, because he has been virtuous and has been found worthy.

What Wonka never expects, is that little Charlie Bucket will teach him an equally important lesson. Virtue is all well and good, especially when it prevents you from being thrown into the garbage chute by crazed squirrels, but there is so much more to life then that. Willie Wonka has everything he could ever possibly need, except for one thing. Charlie Bucket wants for nearly everything that he could need, except for one thing. Together they are able to bring about a “Happily Ever After”, as a business partnership is born.

Fever Pitch, Kicking a Grand Slam in the game of Football

If I had to pick a single genre of film as the most annoyingly cliché, it would be Romantic Comedy. If you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all.

Boy meets girl, boy thinks that girl is pretty; girl takes a second to think about boy, and thinks that boy is kind of cute. Boy clumsily asks girl out, she thinks that his stumbling words and poorly dressed manner is adorable. A montage showing months of dating behavior buries the audience in cuteness and giggles, as we’re subjected to their adorable courtship.

Then we witness, the “point of contention” in the relationship. His issues with commitment, her ex-husband that she’s still in love with, and the ever-popular illegitimate child that has been hidden in the background. This issue takes 45 agonizing minuets to soothe through, and ends with one half of the couple being told that they need to change for the relationship to continue. Often with an forcedly adorable moment of misunderstanding, generally represented by an attractive member of the opposite sex opening a door.

Fever Pitch almost falls into this stereotype, but manages to hang from the lip of the Green Monster by its celluloid fingertips; and drop a decent love story into your lap.

I’m a Sox fan, born and raised. It’s in my blood; I remember all of the games pictured with crystal clarity. Including the infamous Buckner moment; which was spliced into a fantastic comedy bit. Seeing my home team win the World Series again was heart warming, and tears came to my eyes. But that wasn’t the highlight of the movie for me.

The highlight of the film caught me by surprise, as it didn’t fit the Romantic Comedy niche. She had to change just as much as he did for the relationship to work out. There wasn’t a one sided magical solution to the relationship, neither one of them was forced to become someone that they weren’t. That alone makes this a romantic comedy worth watching. Then there's the Red Sox...

Ray Charles a blind man afraid of the dark.

To a simple man, this movie would appear as if the director could not find a light to expose Ray Charles under. One second Ray was a sympathetic tortured soul, then an emotionally abusive man, and then as a musical genius lost in his keyboard. But to me, this portrayal smacked of realism. As people are not, and shall not ever be two-dimensional characters on the silver screen. They have their moments of weakness, their moments of passion, and their moments of cruelty. And that is where this film found its strength, in contrast and comparison.

Much like the multiple facets of Ray’s personality, the lighting and coloring of the movie fell into multiple tones and hues. There were scenes of stark contrast, glossy black laminate with a blinding light shining on it obscuring half of the shot in its glare. The flashback sequences to Ray’s childhood were full of bright glorious color. Georgia’s red clay on a little boy's knee’s, a rainbow of glass bottles dangling from tree branches, and luscious flowing fields of tall green grass.

There was a gritty realism to this film that most period pieces lack. Ray Charles came to stardom during the era of the “Jim Crow” laws, and this movie did not gloss that over at all, and neither did it condemn it. There was segregation in the South, and in this movie it was not there to make a statement, it was there because at that time it belonged there.

The segregation was used to paint a picture of a different world then we New Englanders have grown up with. Not just the colored water fountains, the separate seats on the bus, and the colored rest rooms but an entirely different way of life, a different way of behavior. There was no “enlightened white man” to stand up to the “oppressive red necks”, because there wasn’t one. They were Boys, and the white man was Sir. Towards the end of the movie there was a clumsy scene that seemed to me to be an afterthought of the director. Almost as if the scriptwriter came to him one night and said

“Hey Didn’t Ray get banned from Georgia for life for doing…something? And didn’t it involve the civil rights movement?” Then the director might have chimed in with something along these lines.
“Yeah he did, and they rescinded it in 1979. Now that would make a great ending to my movie!” Fortunately Jamie Foxx portrayed a fantastic Ray Charles, even down to the slightly slurred words and the infamous “junkie itch”. He was able to carry the few less then poetic scenes of the film through on his sheer presence alone.

My favorite aspect of this film (other than the music that is) was the look of this film. The casting director must have traveled back in time to find the extras for this cast. There was a difference in body type for each era of the film. A scrawny underfed mother for Ray’s childhood, a trio of curvaceous backup singers for his stage, and spit polished L.A. lawyers who somehow appeared comfortable in the hideous fashions of the early 1960’s.

Ray Charles lived on this mud ball spinning in space for 74 years, that’s a lot of story to cram into a single film. The story focuses on a few aspects of Ray’s life, and blatantly skips decades of his life. It would have been impossible to show an audience everything there was about the man, so the director showed us his genius and his frailty. Reminding us that for all of his gold records and Grammys, he still put on his socks one at a time, and had to be paid in singles so that he knew the club owner wasn’t cheating him.

Take my love, take my ticket, show me to my seat in the theatre

Just sit right back and you’ll hear a tale
A tale of a Firefly Class Ship
That started from Serentiy Valley
And took a cinema trip…

Firefly was cancelled and sent to the land of the DVD box set before Joss Whedon had a chance to tell his story. Thanks to Universal Pictures, Serenity has taken to the black once again.

I’m not a fan of movies based on Television shows, for the most part I find them to be dumbed down, formulaic bits of nostalgic fluff designed to separate me from my cash. Entertaining, but of little to no redeeming value. I think that it’s possible that Joss Whedon feels the same way, as Serenity was not at all a bit of nostalgic fluff.

The story picks up the characters several months from when we last saw them. Work has obviously been difficult for the Captain to find, but there has been no shortage of trouble. One small time heist quickly sets the crew onto a larger scale adventure then any episode of the show gave us before. Which is exactly what this movie should be centered around, a story too big for the small screen.

The look and feel of this cult show is alive and well, but the scale has changed. Firefly never got the budget that the show needed to really show us much of it’s universe. We saw a settlement here, a spaceship there, and even sometimes we saw a civlized world. Now we get to see broad shots of spaceships in flight, stark lighting contrasts, and many new sights. We even get to see character and plot risks taken by Whedon, things that I highly doubt that a network would have allowed him on a weekly series.

If you liked Firefly, you will enjoy this film. If you have not seen Firefly, fear not you will be able to follow this movie. While there is no contrived “explanation sequence” the characters dialogue at the beginning of the movie is enough to bring you up to speed. If you did not enjoy Firefly, you most likely won’t take the time to go and see this movie. I plan on seeing this movie in the theatres again, it was worth separating from my hard earned cash.

written September 28, 2005 after pre-screening

Comic Book Reviews - May 11, 2005

Green Lantern: Rebirth #6 Final Issue
If there is a revolving door to the after life, it exists in the comic book industry. Hal Jordan went mad and tried to rewrite time and space(in his image) in the early 90’s. In the late 90’s he gave his life to stop a cosmic phenomena called “the sun eater”.Then a couple years later, his errant soul was chosen as the anchor to God’s Wrathknown as The Specter. Using his indomitable willpower Jordan transformed the spirit of vengeance into a spirit of redemption. The fans spawned this mini series; countless Green Lantern fans wanted Hal back. So Geoff Johns brought him back. I was really apprehensive about this storyline when I first heard of it over a year ago (they was some serious hyping going on), as it had potential to be a steaming pile of termite droppings.

I was impressed by this series. It’s full of esoteric DC universe references that only long time readers can understand, and at the same time it has a flair of youth full exuberance to it. Definitely worth reprinting as a collected edition, which I am sure, it will be.

Ultimate Secret #2
Another mini series set in “the Ultimate” universe, a ‘new look’ at classic Marvel Characters and storylines. Some hate it, as many classic characters have different attitudes or origins now. Some love it (myself for one), as the storylines are more in tune to what Marvel Comics first wrote about in the 60’s.
Of course I may be biased, as this book is written by Warren Ellis, and heralding the coming of Galactus or “Gah Lak Tus” to the Ultimate Storylines. One of my favorite writers in the industry taking a fresh look at one of the all time best comic book storylines. It’s an issue 2, answering precious few questions and leaving us with more.

JSA #73
An Alex Ross painting of Captain Marvel graces the cover of this “in between issue”, as we wrap up one storyline and bridge to another. A new face takes on the mantle of an old villain, a hero fallen from grace begs forgiveness, and an insidious evil tempts a once honest man.
Stay tuned next month when…

Superman/Batman #19
Another bridge issue, May seems to be a good month for that. Batman and Superman spend a day monitoring the activities of Supergirl. As do a pair of villains in a nicely scripted and plotted piece of sequential art. And they still don’t know if she’s really a Kryptonian or not. As well written as this issue is, and as much as I enjoyed it. Jeph Loeb, enough is enough. Answer the question already. There is only so long that a mystery can linger before if becomes stale.
If this series has another “non-continuity story” as it’s next arch, it will lose a lot of its power. If it stays in tune with the rest of DC’s titles and follows their summer story arch, this series might be ‘the series’ to watch.

Supreme Power #16
Several issues back Mark Milton revealed his super powered presence to the American people, severing his ties to the US Government. Now the General makes his move, to take Milton apart. Showing that power is not always the ability to fly faster then a speeding bullet, or to be more powerful then a locomotive.

JLA #113
Kurt Busiek’s run on the worlds greatest super hero’s continues. Many bad guys, many good guys, Batman scowls, Superman punches things, and the Flash gets an ominous and cryptic line to end the issue with a cliffhanger. If you like the JLA, you’ll like this. If you don’t like JLA you won’t like this.

Fables #37
Thirty-Seven issues and going strong! When I first picked up an in house add for Fables I was curious, I didn’t think that it would go on this long. A series about Fairy Tale characters surviving in the modern world, I assumed the worst. I assumed that we’d be seeing a “white-wolf” rehash of the Brothers Grimm’s, I am glad that I was wrong. The characters are refugees from their home stories, as an evil adversary has taken over the worlds of legend.

In this issue Little Boy Blue has stolen the Vorpal Sword and the Witching Cloak from Fabletown (a little noticed borough of NYC) and has returned home in search of his true love; a young maiden in a red riding cape. The occupying forces have uncovered his presence, and have gone to their superiors to report his incursion, and a one of the adversary’s minions is revealed.

Ultimate Fantastic Four #18
The First Family of Comics written by Warren Ellis. After 18 issues I am still not sure about this series. The characters are younger then the icons’ that I’m accustomed to. And the 4 issue story arcs are very formulaic.
Chapter 1, Bright Shiny new plot!
Chapter 2, Reed gets the team into trouble
Chapter 3, Ben gets the team out of trouble by bashing something
Chapter 4, Reed and the team are hailed as intellectual pioneers for their actions.
I’m surprised, as the stories still don’t carry much weight; even after 18 issues. I believe that I am done with this series. As two pages of cute dialogue to end a lackluster 4-issue arc isn’t worth it.

Ex Machina Special Edition
Less then one year under it’s belt and this series is still fantastic. This was a reprint of issue #1, with a fantastic price tag, Free.
If you want to pick up a new series, I cannot recommend this highly enough. Civil Engineer Mitchell Hundred gets super powers from an odd artifact found in the Hudson River, has a short lived career as a super hero, and is now the Mayor of NYC. All three stories are being told at the same time.
The book is free, pick it up already.


Desolation Jones #1
Warren Ellis’s brand new book, which I’ve been hearing about for a month now. I feel that Ellis holds back when he writes a character created by someone else. His writing shines best in his own creations. This book will disappear off of the shelves before we know it. Partially because of the writers name, but mostly because of the work itself.

Rising Stars,Voices of the Dead #1
Another spin off series from Rising Stars, why didn’t I learn my lesson with the last spin off? The main character can see and hear the dead, and the dead know that he can. They call out to him, desperate for the attention of the one person who can give it to them. In the main series, Lionel is a solitary man who shuns the world. In this ‘untold tale’ he has set up shop as a paranormal investigator. Why I bought this is beyond me.

I also picked up the Final issue of the Adam Strange mini series, Breach #5, and Hawkman #39 which I haven't gotten to yet.

written May 11, 2005; Title links are for the collected editions of the storylines if they are available.